I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
