She's JV to your varsity
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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