she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Do vagina's smell?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
