I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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