he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
