1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize