I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
