the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
