It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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