i already hear my dad disowning me
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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