Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
