i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
