I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
