sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
