do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Randomize
