ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
