so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize