drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
