Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
