It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
