Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
