She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
