yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i will never coherently bang her
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
