I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
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