I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
