She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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