I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
