Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
