I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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