Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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