some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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