I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
