Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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