Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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