i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
