If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
