i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
She tied me up with her honor cords...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I'm both gender and math confused
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
