Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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