Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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