I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
