I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
