two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
