Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Randomize
