I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
