Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
