Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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