i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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