K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
sex in a hospital.. check
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
