She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
