then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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